How do people get over theres insecurities and mental issues? i really need some advice please!?

ok so i was with this girl for over a year and i would always think she was cheating on me or lying for no reason. thoughts would just pop in my head of her cheating. i would also get extremely jealous and come up with ridiculous stories in my head of what she could be doing. its almost like im trying to make myself jealous and mad. but i hate it and i cant seem to stop thinking like this. i would just get jealous or angry about the STUPIDEST things and i just couldnt help it. i lost the love of my life because of the way i think. i have been in therapy for almost a year and we have figure out some things to what may be causing all of this but nothing to fix it. its like im stuck this way. i could never trust her and had no reason not too. i would get jealous if she even looked at another guy and i would start thinking about all these things she wants to do with him and what not.... its driving me crazy. any advice or suggestions? i really need help people. i hate being like thisHow do people get over theres insecurities and mental issues? i really need some advice please!?
Welcome to the club. its not insecurity though, its trust issues. i have them as well. you're always going to get the stupid ideas popping into your head, its just a matter of how you deal with them. you have to develop trust with a girl. if something shady happens and doesn't seem right....ask her about it in a nice way and i often find that turning the tables works. if she does something off color, ask her what she would do and how she would feel if you did that to her to help her understand your point of view. im with a girl now that i try really hard to trust, but i still get those thoughts from time to time. i used to be like you and in an effort to be happier, i tried to be more openminded and more trusting...which if very very hard. im not going to sugar coat it...its tough. sounds like you have been hurt bad and that is why you brain does what it does. mind over matter. think logically about it. if somethings not right, ask. be nice about it and don't come off over bearing and jealous, just handle the situation delicately. its hard to deal with, but it is possible








good luck man...How do people get over theres insecurities and mental issues? i really need some advice please!?
Confront your fear. Think about the worst case scenario, which would be that she is cheating and doesn't love you. What does that mean and where do you go from there? The answer is your key to making peace with the issue.





After you've done that little excercise, think about it logically. If she didn't love you or wanted to be with someone else and you guys aren't married, why wouldn't she just break up with you? Is there any hard evidence that she's cheating on you that you just can't overlook? After you evaluate those questions, you have to actually make the decision to trust her.





Making that decision is a commitment to not look for things that are not there and to not accuse her of cheating.





Also, it sounds like you need to work on your own self-esteem issues and work out whatever happened to you in the past to make you so paranoid.